{"title":"All Products","description":null,"products":[{"product_id":"1999-classic-short-sleeve-tee","title":"\"1999\" Classic Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eWe can probably all agree that 1999 is the most RAD year there ever was, But even more cool than that?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis 1999 printed, classic crew neck tee!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eShow off your childhood pride with this awesome 1999 shirt!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFabric Color: Ash - 99% cotton, 1% polyester.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHonestly? 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Yeah, me neither, but watching it on Youtube Shorts taught me all about Mike, and his pornographic memory... \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🙄Product features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% polyester that holds shape and dries quickly\u003cbr\u003e- Side seams for added structure and longer-lasting fit\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit collar with seam for collar elasticity\u003cbr\u003e- Two fabric weights: 4.0 oz\/yd² (113 g\/m²) or 6.0 oz\/yd² (170 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYapping contest much?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🥱Care instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean - Do not iron - Tumble dry: low heat - Do not bleach - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), gentle cycle\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut seriously, why does Utah Lake smell so bad tho??\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ S","offer_id":58468600512815,"sku":"22090086314491010730","price":33.69,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ S","offer_id":58468600545583,"sku":"11107391039476675094","price":36.47,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ M","offer_id":58468600578351,"sku":"48825467316503563580","price":35.14,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ M","offer_id":58468600611119,"sku":"25050492260682254927","price":39.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ L","offer_id":58468600643887,"sku":"11774657240964461574","price":36.24,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ L","offer_id":58468600676655,"sku":"27969483600048197922","price":40.8,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ XL","offer_id":58468600709423,"sku":"83231951186638453591","price":37.6,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ XL","offer_id":58468600742191,"sku":"44310581056058755079","price":41.14,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ 2XL","offer_id":58468600774959,"sku":"18996890268598880870","price":38.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ 2XL","offer_id":58468600807727,"sku":"10321180824372403495","price":42.1,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ 3XL","offer_id":58468600840495,"sku":"20876483976633092223","price":39.71,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ 3XL","offer_id":58468600873263,"sku":"11109021497118127247","price":43.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0994\/0192\/4911\/files\/17521888099484073343_2048.jpg?v=1789433915"},{"product_id":"big-boss-man-tee","title":"\"Big Boss Man\" Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eIt's Yuge trust me, probably the Yugest tie youve ever seen! I asked them if they had ever seen anything Yuger, and they said Mister President its Massive, we had to bring it in on a truck. Can you believe that? They had to bring it in on a truck... Unbelievable.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e😳Product features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% polyester — strong, quick-drying fabric that holds shape😁\u003cbr\u003e- Side seams and shoulder tape for improved structure and longevity🤷‍♂️\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit, seam-finished collar and tagless design for comfort😏\u003cbr\u003e- Two fabric weights available (113 g\/m² or 170 g\/m²); regular fit that runs true to size🤯\u003cbr\u003e- Assembled in the USA from globally sourced parts😎\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🥱Care instructions - Do not dryclean - Do not iron - Tumble dry: low heat - Do not bleach - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), gentle cycle\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI STF if this computer dies on me right now I'm gonna crash the heck out!! \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ S","offer_id":58469314003247,"sku":"15270955233598329655","price":33.69,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ S","offer_id":58469314036015,"sku":"35155969010707915169","price":36.47,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ M","offer_id":58469314068783,"sku":"23070882294706868929","price":35.14,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ M","offer_id":58469314101551,"sku":"30072713932173113937","price":39.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ L","offer_id":58469314134319,"sku":"27437232268054031725","price":36.24,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ L","offer_id":58469314167087,"sku":"19482660502501332125","price":40.8,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ XL","offer_id":58469314199855,"sku":"20852201411197463123","price":37.6,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ XL","offer_id":58469314232623,"sku":"89118732625725680936","price":41.14,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ 2XL","offer_id":58469314265391,"sku":"29635834360484088186","price":38.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ 2XL","offer_id":58469314298159,"sku":"91874756920981856780","price":42.1,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 4 oz. \/ 3XL","offer_id":58469314330927,"sku":"28921217142131261909","price":39.71,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White stitching \/ 6 oz. \/ 3XL","offer_id":58469314363695,"sku":"27181255202475827842","price":43.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0994\/0192\/4911\/files\/11228129459132313663_2048.jpg?v=1789440815"},{"product_id":"385-white-flexfit","title":"“385 White” Flexfit Cap","description":"\u003cp\u003eOne day I decided to just go hiking up on some random mountainside, and I gave up after about half an hour... I think about that a lot. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyway, this is my 2nd favorite hat of all time, an absolutely phenomenal lid!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOk, now I'm gonna go try to not give up on my dreams today...\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S\/M \/ White","offer_id":58481166385455,"sku":"20811143506473515467","price":48.9,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L\/XL \/ White","offer_id":58481166418223,"sku":"31615862088126388878","price":48.9,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0994\/0192\/4911\/files\/15937963402935328047_2048.jpg?v=1789587100"},{"product_id":"385-thin-sun-shirt-for-the-man","title":"“385 White” Thin Sun Shirt For The Man","description":"\u003cp\u003eOne time when I was like 15, I tried climbing an 8 foot fence and got my leg stuck in it and it kinda hurt.  \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnyway, this is a pretty cool shirt! \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🙄Product features\u003cbr\u003e- 88% polyester \/ 12% spandex for durable stretch and softness😁\u003cbr\u003e- Lightweight fabric (6 oz\/yd²) for breathable all-day wear😳\u003cbr\u003e- Built-in UV protection up to 50 SPF😎\u003cbr\u003e- Reinforced shoulder tape and hemmed edges for long-lasting shape🫣\u003cbr\u003e- Sewn-in label and hemmed sleeves for clean, durable finish😏\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🤓Care instructions - Do not iron - Tumble dry: low heat - Do not bleach - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), gentle cycle\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOk, I’m gonna go watch “Air America” again, and you should to!! \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ White stitching","offer_id":58513087463727,"sku":"28253731243663302164","price":61.09,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White stitching","offer_id":58513087496495,"sku":"20265443294431898677","price":61.09,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White stitching","offer_id":58513087529263,"sku":"28868584405175716452","price":61.09,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White stitching","offer_id":58513087562031,"sku":"22597554798733190765","price":61.09,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White stitching","offer_id":58513087594799,"sku":"31667154007105180138","price":61.09,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0994\/0192\/4911\/files\/17643526452516295472_2048.jpg?v=1789920610"},{"product_id":"385-white-fleece-joggers","title":"\"385 White\" Fleece Joggers","description":"\u003cp\u003eThese descriptions are the most difficultest part of doing this. But also probably the most funest too. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut I gotta be honest, these joggers aren't really my sort of thing, but our awesome(-ly infuriating) supplier, won't get me the ones I want, and these are the best bottoms I could find in their catalog...\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI still think nobody actually reads the Product Features\u003cbr\u003e- Durable 5-thread stitching for reinforced seams\u003cbr\u003e- Snug cuffed, side-seamed legs that retain their shape\u003cbr\u003e- Comfortable elastic waistband with matching flat drawstring\u003cbr\u003e- Two front cross pockets plus a top-stitched back-leg patch pocket\u003cbr\u003e- Tightly knit 3-end fleece (8.5 oz\/yd²) with ribbed waist and cuffs\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAnd the Care Instructions, they're basically the same on every single thing.\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOK, now I'm gonna go and have a nice chill (and by chill, I mean speedrun) cruise up Provo Canyon and get me a hamburger from Back40. ✌🏻\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":58513192386863,"sku":"30939092908761329136","price":40.35,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":58513192419631,"sku":"94252954927970179032","price":40.35,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0994\/0192\/4911\/files\/8269485138577549080_2048.jpg?v=1789922462"},{"product_id":"385-white-athletic-joggers","title":"\"385 White\" Athletic Joggers","description":"\u003cp\u003eWhen I'm out in public, I really like to use the Hard R, like joggER, or bikER, because it's hard to understand when somebody says jogga, or bika, but I also find it quite rewarding to say ni...ice try! HaHa! You thought I was really gonna say it didn't you!!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e(i kinda considered it fr)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyway, the thing I like most about these joggERs is the way the band sits, nice and smooth, it doesn't bunch up like some of the others I have, also, I box 3x a week in mine and they're super comfortable and durable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003eHere's your Product Features\u003cbr\u003e- 95% polyester, 5% spandex — soft, lightweight stretch knit\u003cbr\u003e- Side-seam construction with double-layer pockets for secure carry\u003cbr\u003e- Flat drawstring waist for adjustable fit\u003cbr\u003e- All-over print that covers the entire garment\u003cbr\u003e- Medium-weight (7.5 oz\/yd²) fabric with printed care label inside\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAnd your Care Instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Do not tumble dry\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNow I'm gonna go hit State again, ride to the capital, and get myself some sushi at Itto on the way back down. Deuces✌🏻\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"L \/ Seam thread color automatically matched to design","offer_id":58513240162607,"sku":"24424421456885582953","price":44.13,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0994\/0192\/4911\/files\/6873969829218595440_2048.jpg?v=1789925077"},{"product_id":"385-white-minimal-insignia-hoodie","title":"\"385 White\" Minimal Insignia Hoodie","description":"\u003cp\u003eGuess who just got their Amazon order? Yeah, thats right, me! And you want to know what I got? 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